i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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