I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
