One girl and one boy is just not enough.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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