No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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