Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Found your dick twin last night
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize