he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
