but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
