Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
