He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
