Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
