Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
My boob is missing a layer of skin
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
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