In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
