I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
This is classic penis vs brain.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
How does it feel to date your dad?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize