He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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