She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
