problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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