Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
being pregnant is like rehab
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
