Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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