You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
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