So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
