apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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