Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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