similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
