i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
i think im in europe. pls send help
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
we should paint friendship bongs
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