There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Randomize
