if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Im part way to drunk.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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