So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
i think i have two assholes
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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