Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
