I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
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