If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
