Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
