i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
This is the prime rib incident all over again
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
