6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize
