is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize