We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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