I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
