One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
