sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
