Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
