I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Maybe he injected his testicle?
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize
