i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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