So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
