I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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