I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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