I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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