R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
