whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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