you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
