Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
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