This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
