why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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